March 21, 2012

It's 5:45 in the morning...
DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR NEIGHBOR IS?

EDITOR'S NOTE: I'm in the process of launching my new blog, "Defining Audacity." For the next week and a half, I'll be re-posting some of my favorite untimely blog posts from "Fire & Motion." This post originally ran in October 2009. "Defining Audacity" officially launches on April 1.

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I want to share an e-mail that I recently sent to one of my neighbors. This is in response to a letter she shoved underneath my front door. I won't bore you with her whole letter – which was rather lengthy – but here are the highlights:

• Captain Augustus McCrae (my pooch) woke her up at 5:30 in the morning
• She marched an entire city block – at 5:45 a.m. – to tell me that he woke her up
• I wasn't home to hear her complain
• I'm rude
• She's going to call the city

Here was my response (this is straight from the heart):

Melissa,

My name is Drew Myers and I live at 2509 Honeysuckle. I got your note about my dog raising hell at 5:30 in the morning, and I wanted to drop you a line.

I tried to give you a call, but your line as been busy all evening. (Ironically enough...we had one of your “For Sale By Owner” sheets for a family friend who was interested in your house. I thought your name looked familiar. Your phone number and this e-mail address were listed on the sheet. Lucky for me.)

Anyway...I’m terribly sorry about Gus (my dog).
I HATE the fact he woke you up. I had a business meeting out of town this morning and was going to be gone all day. Instead of leaving him kenneled in the house – like we normally do – I HAD to give him access to the backyard.

Again, I’m very sorry about that.

I did want to address one thing that you implied in your letter....this does NOT happen all the time. Ninety-five percent of the time we are either home OR Gus is in his kennel. Does Gus Bark from time to time? Yes...he’s a dog. That’s one of the reasons why we have him. When people are lurking around our house at 5:45 in the morning...I’m glad he goes crazy.

Anyway...sorry again. If you DO feel inclined to call the city about this isolated incident make sure you give them my cell phone so they can get me anytime (817) 909-XXXX. (If you would like to call and discuss further– don’t hesitate to drop me a line as well.)

NOTE: If for some reason that happens again, just yell and tell him to shut the hell up. (That’s what I do to other peoples’ dogs – including yours.)

Take care,

Drew

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would be mad if my neighbors dog was so loud he woke me up, I side my home, from a block away. I wouldn't have left a note though. I would have just filed the complaint.

Anonymous said...

Oops that should read "inside". It's really hard to fill out this comment form and proofread it on a phone!

Hatton said...

I would have taken him to my Uncle's farm where all dogs eventually go...

jennasauber said...

Kill them with kindness - and humor - because life happens, dogs bark, babies cry, and the doctor runs late. You move on.

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